A Time To Reflect

charukesi July 11th, 2005

My husband received this sms last evening from a client who has recently moved abroad - HI (NAME SPELT WRONG) HW R U?

Nice ‘thinking of you’ message - except

1. this was not written by a 13 year old, as you may have immediately thought (as I did - what with the all caps and the spelling and the awful HW R Us - but let me not get started on that one)

2. it was sent at 7.45 on a sunday evening.

My issue is with the latter.

What is it with people who assume that having a call phone automatically puts you in the market for unwanted communication at any time of the day - and night?

Another of my husband’s colleagues (ya, he does make friends with some strange people) called him last week at 11.30 in the night to discuss an issue that even he did not think was that important… (I know this because he cheerfully signed off when it was suggested to him that this discussion could happen at a more decent hour)…

I also know that people carelessly pass around my mobile number to anyone who cares to ask them - it does not occur to them to ask me or suggest that the third person asks me directly…

I understand that in India, concepts like privacy are not such a big deal - but it seems to me that with the cell phone, people have lost all perspective.

It is not ok to send me sms forwards (sometimes just as a way of ‘keeping in touch’). Or call at any odd hour because something has gone wrong at work - surely it can wait till the next morning…

How did people cope before the mobile phone became so popular? How did we live without this need to be communicado all the time?

And please, do not even suggest to me that if you want a mobile phone, then you must be prepared for this. NO. This argument has a very shiv senaesque logic about it - if you wear a mini skirt, then you must be prepared to be molested.

I have a mobile phone for my convenience. So that I can keep in touch with people I know - friends, family, colleagues, acquaintances to whom I have given the number - and they with me. Within reasonable boundaries of time and space…

And not so that Atal Bihari Vajpayee can call me and request me in his gruff voice to vote for the BJP this time… (ok, I am sure he did not personally dial the number, but what the heck)

Or for HW R U messages… I am fine, thank you. And you?

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charukesi July 9th, 2005

This is about a couple of wonderful blogs (and of course, the people behind them) I came across recently -

The first is Eileen’s All over the map. She lives in Delhi and currently has a very interesting A - Z on Delhi going on at her blog. She has reached G now, starting with guns and guards, through galis and gobar, and now on gurdwaras and gardens… And she has superb and relevant photographs on many of her posts…

Very charming blog - do check it out… And this is Eileen on flickr…

The other, and very special blog is written by someone I just met on flickr - Julie 70. The 70 is on her flickr name as well as blog - that is her age… Her blog Julie 70 is in french, but I just had to mention it here.

Her photoblog on flickr, aptly called joy of life surely needs no language skills…

Julie on herself on flickr - I just passed my 70th birthday, but life is beautiful and so much to do and to learn still. Writing diary for 60 years, making photos only recently. I assisted micro-computing revolution from inside, and now… discovered blogging.

When I mentioned to her that I am from India, this is what she wrote to me… When I was young (that was longtime ago) I have seen a beautifull unforgottable indian film, made me dream and also my heart hurt because of the powerty and the womens not right that was despicted and had beautifull song and a child actor in it. But I do not remember any more the names.

Way to go, Julie! Most of us can learn lessons from her on life and living…

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charukesi July 8th, 2005

In the last few days, I have come across three different posts / discussions which have left me feeling shaken and stirred. These writings in isolation are disturbing enough but reading them one after the other makes me think very uncomfortable thoughts. They are all on the subject of sexual harrasment - in some form or the other.

The first is Hemangini’s widely discussed post Train to Chennai.. Here she describes an incident she experienced (suffered?) on a train journey where she was molested by a stranger….

The second is a message posted by a Mumbai ryzer on the networking forum - How to get stalked on ryze! (I don’t know if you can read this article if you are not signed in on ryze - so I will try to descirbe this in some detail). This lady on ryze has posted a message about how she was stalked and harrassed by a prominent member of the networking group. Following voices raised in suppport and some outraged voices in protest, she has gone ahead and named the person later.

The third one which I just read is by Chinmayee on Jasmeen’s Blank Noise Project. Here Chinmayee speaks up on behalf of Jasmeen who is working in the area of street harrassment - she responds to some comments on Jasmeen’s blog which contain suggestions to do something more concrete than demonstrating - these comments also go on to suggest that Jasmeen would be wise to stop hoping for miracles (if you are wondering what is the miracle here, it is expecting that men will stop mentally undressing women and groping at her body in public spaces).

Men will be men and libido conquers all?

Why should Jasmeen or Chinmayee even have to be in this position where they have to respond to comments which suggest that what Jasmeen is doing is inadequate and even meaningless…

These three posts have more than their theme in common…

One

Each of them (this is much lesser in the ryze message but very strong in the other two blog posts) has the woman writer voicing her thoughts about how she is made to feel responsible for what has happened with her…

Hemangini says - I called my mum after I left the cop station the first time. I said, “Do you think I over-reacted?” And this other voice in my head laughed at me, and our society. A strange man, touches you twice in the middle of the night, and your greatest worry when you screamed and complained, is, “Did I over react”?!

And Chinmayee in Blank Noise Project points out - We’ve all had terrible experiences. How many of us have had our breasts grabbed? How many of us have had men in crowded buses jerking off against our backs? Do we talk about it? No. Are we made to feel like it’s not our fault? No.

As I commented on this blog, that something happens all the time does not make it “normal” or even more acceptable. Certainly not sexual harrassment, of even the “mildest form”

In case of the ryze message, there is an active (I suspect soon to border on the violent) debate on about whether this woman’s post amounts to slander - because the man in question is a “decent” man…

Two

And for me the more disturbing aspect is that in each of these cases, scores of women have responded to the original post describing their own experience - “I have been through this too” - and saluting the woman for having the courage to talk about it - first.

It is to me, like the floodgates have suddenly opened and each woman has a groping, stalking, molesting story to narrate…

In case of the ryze incident, when I read the post, my first response was, I know who this man is and I am glad she is getting this out in the open…. And to my surprise and great shock, it was not the person I thought it was - so what does that make it, more than one man on such a popular business networking site who does such things on a regular basis…?

Going through such incidents is one thing but having to talk about it - to anyone, your closest friend, or even your mother - is quite another, equally harrowing thing. How long will we keep this within the realm of shame (lajja) for the woman - the victim - leaving the perpetrator scot-free and full of cheap thrills…?

This is how child molestors get away with it again and again - after molesting litle girls - and even boys - within their own family…

Hush, don’t say such lies…

Good girls don’t talk about such things

You must have imagined it…

Related link : Also pelase read Dina Mehta’s post SkypeMe Eve - Makes me wonder whether the SkypeMe button attached to a ‘female’ profile somehow suggests a new form of phone sex.

• Society & Development , - Gender issues
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charukesi July 7th, 2005

In the wake of the terrible bomb blasts in London, here are some updates I found on blogging resources…

Here is the wiki take on this - and the guardian blog - both with dynamic content, reporting from the site, as it were.

And on flickr, I found a forum already formed and discussions on - Explosions on tubes and bus?

And this group London bombs - with 284 photographs from various sites, when I last checked…

There is loads of updated information available on these web resources, including the police casualty phone number - people uploading news and pictures through the net, where phone connections have been affected…

(Reminded me of the time the blogging world reacted to the tsunami…)

Update : flickr has another discussion forum The Spirit of Londoners which begins with this post by Monkey Magic -

I have been very impressed with a few things today:

Well done everyone I think - triumph in the face of adversity.

Iti s amazing how such times of adversity bring out the fighting spirit in people and bring to the fore pride in their city / country.

Here, Dina Mehta and Patricia McKenna talk about the wiki response and the power of the collaborative process.

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charukesi July 7th, 2005

Just got back from a couple of days in Delhi - as usual, happy to be back in Bombay. Just being in Bombay makes me feel that all is well with the world (ok, here I push the Worli image and other such disturbing thoughts from my mind, just for a moment, ok). Good to be back home.

And now this post from Annie about what the Delhi drizzle means to her -

Besides, the weather’s too delicious to allow critiques. Or angst.

Delhi rains are. Stilling.
Like you want to be very still. Like the world might stop, and gawk at it’s own reflection in a puddle, and brood about how happy it is.

The weather in Delhi is stilling… This is a picture I got back from Delhi - I cannot think of a better word to describe it..

Annie also says, Funny, how it was never like this in Bombay.

Bombay - the rains are lashing.
They bind you, they confine you, they swamp you, they confront you, they rise up in sheets and walls and are nearly an assault on the skin, but they don’t stop you. Strangely, Bombay rains are not ’stilling’.

True, the rains in Bombay are not stilling. Or relaxing. To me, they are about life and movement and destruction. All at the same time. Like the huge waves crashing on the rocks at Marine Drive.

Somewhat like Bombay itself…

What does the Bombay monsoon mean to you?

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charukesi July 6th, 2005

Update : Yazad has pointed out the Livelihood Freedom Campaign Petition which is a movement by the CSS to address the plight of street entrepreneurs who work without any kind of legal backing, making them vulnerable to harrassment and restrictions..

Please go and sign the petition here…
***

Sitting here in Delhi on work, my mind keeps going back to last Sunday evening. A typical windy evening at Worli seaface… Couples meeting on the sly, women friends catching up over corn and conversations, parents with children clamouring for candyfloss and rides on the small merry-go-round, serious walkers and joggers, some with their dogs…

The corn-seller was doing brisk business - she and her small daughter and her smaller son huddled around the small coal stove… People crowding around her, each repeating his/her own order, despite the fact that the corn seller went about her work without even glancing up at any one of them…

And suddenly, this police van stopped on the road in front of them. A fat policeman walked out, picked up the stove and walked towards where we were sitting - on the short wall facing the rocks and the sea. And as we sat watching in open-mouthed horror (and I am not exaggerating here), he dropped the stove along with the contents on the rocks - more than twelve feet down…. And he left as quickly as he had materialized - and I still sat open-mouthed (that must have been a pretty picture - but I was too shaken to even think of taking a photograph of the cops).

The last glimpse I had of the cops was of the corn-seller in her yellow sari shouting heatedly to the rear of the van as they drove away…

All I could manage to think and say was - This is her livelihood - and the cop has managed to take it away from her in a moment - and it was not as if she was doing anything illegal or never-done-before… What will she do now?

She did not do anything - again out of nowhere, a boy much taller and older than her son (who was with her near the stove earlier) materialized, he slid down the wall and went down to the rocks. And picked up the stove.

And climbed up with it - as his head surfaced, some other man came up to him and took the stove from his hands, cleaned it and handed it back to the woman.

And the woman set up shop in exactly the same place as before. Very soon, it was business as usual for her… And all this happened in less than four minutes.

She will be back at the same place the next day. So will her customers.

And the police too…

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charukesi July 2nd, 2005

Girls nowadays don’t dream of their charming prince riding on a white horse in search of a beautiful wife – they dream of Rakesh Roshan getting off his white car to offer them a role in his next movie… either ways they are swept off their feet…

Times are achanging…

And the fairness creams market keeps track of every single change that is happening in society – every need and every dream of their core target audience – young girls with dark skin – who dream of a ‘better life’ – which only fairer skin can lead them to – which in turn only fairness creams can help them achieve…

Now to look at some of these changes in the fairness creams market –

o Skin care and not just fairness : With more exposure to sophisticated products and foreign brands (through communication, if not actual product experience), the target audience (the young girls mentioned before) is demanding more than basic fairness – fairness creams no longer call themselves just that– they are now positioned as ‘skin care’ products – exactly how much care does the skin get through cheap and harmful bleach is anyone’s guess… in any case, with names like Fair and Lovely, Fairglow, Naturally Fair and Fairever, there can be no doubt in anyone’s minds what exactly these products promise – let no one be fooled…

o Going the ‘natural’ route : chemical is out, natural is in – look at the number of products around that promise ‘natural ingredients’ – if one promises vitamin M, the other conveys that the product is bursting at the seams with saffron – or milk or honey or whatever it takes to bleach the skin in six quick weeks – leading to a fairer and married-to-the-man-of-your-dreams you…

o Specialty products – there are now variants to suit every “skin type” and every need – fairness creams are now available for oily skin, for winter use, for removing marks – you name it – there is even a fairness creams for elbows – yes, you read it right – elbows…

o Dream career and dream man : And most importantly, recent ads for fairness creams are not centred just around the dream-man-marriage theme (although that remains the ultimate objective) – but have a ‘career orientation’ – you can now be an air hostess or a popular cricket commentator – depending on the flavour of the month - or you can even be a film star –

Sure times are achanging…. But some things never change – like the desire for a son – again advertising (especially in this category) has exploited this weakness quite cleverly – it is possible to almost look into the mind of the father who has been “cursed” not just with a daughter, but a dark-skinned daughter – who cannot reach that well-paying dream job – or cannot even be married off easily… just the words in the ad kaash mera beta hota encapsulates every emotion that this market thrives on… or is it ‘preys’on?

As long as the search for the fair bride remains, fairness creams will continue to rule the roost – and they will continue to exploit every single weakness in their consumers – and in ways that the consumer herself does not know she is being exploited… If society has even an inkling of such a notion, such ads reinforce these notions – do not forget, dark skin is ugly and will stand in the way of all your dreams…

Following protests from all quarters, marketers have now tried various things to repair their damaged image… some of the ads now try to soften the blow – he is lucky to have you, says one ad - sure, the “boy” is lucky – but remember this bit of luck happens after a magical transformation has taken place on the girl’s face – thanks to the latest fairness cream… to an already vulnerable young woman, such a strong reinforcement spells ‘zero self esteem’ – so much for lucky boys.

Another laughable effort is the Fair and Lovely Foundation – which aims to “promote economic empowerment of women” - all other things remaining constant, a fairer skin leads to economic empowerment?

There is nothing that cannot be changed – goes the line for a popular fairness cream brand – nothing, it looks like, except the colonial hang-up on fair skin…

***
Debashish had added some interesting facts in his Hindi translation - including the information that in the skincare products market, more than 60% products are aimed at fairness. And that companies claim that nearly 25% of fairness cream users are men. I had written about this in my earlier post on elbow creams; if this statistic intrigues you, check it out…

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charukesi July 1st, 2005

My article on the dreams sold by the fairness creams companies is out at the Hindi blogzine Nirantar…

Read the Hindi version here - Mohe gora rang dei de (translated by Debashish Chakrabarty for Nirantar)

I am posting the original English version here soon.. Watch this space…

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charukesi July 1st, 2005

This morning, I woke up (yet again) to the wonders of the wide open ether space that brings complete strangers in contact - otherwise known as the internet.

Bob Reid on flickr (who goes under the mysterious name ‘paladinsf’) has gifted me with a flickrpro account. I have for a while now been looking enviously at every account of flickr which has the magical word *pro* against it - and telling myself that I was too un-pro a photographer to aim for this… And now a totally wonderful kind stranger has dropped this on my lap.

Flcikr bliss ! Now watch me develop shutter-forefinger (er, tennis elbow?)

Yes, I am gushing… so?

Deep breath. One more deep breath.

What the heck, yippee!

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I have just stopped blubbering with mad joy… and now I am all ready to give back to the world - strike while the mood lasts and ask - you may or may not (more likely not) receive but what the heck!

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charukesi July 1st, 2005

I remember some of my most exciting moments in school were when we got free samples of new products - usually food-beverage types - I would run home proudly and show them off to friends and family… And my parents would never hear the end of it till we actually brought home the stuff in a much larger quantity than the sample. Of course, many times, the stuff lay untouched after that - like the horrendous milk-additive made with soya, the name of which I forget now…

To put this in perspective - imagine this…

Parent

Speech bubble - yes, yes, we will buy the super-sugary-soya-syrup, just stop talking about it

Thought bubble - pesky brat - what did I do to deserve this?

Marketer

Speech bubble - our super-sugary-soya-syrup is the best for growing kids - it has soya which gives strength to your bones and Vitamin x+y (whole squared) which makes your teeth brittle and cool… AND you get this free tacky plastic bottle-cap with this sample. And if you buy two packs of the ssss, you get the tacky plastic bottle free!

Thought bubble - Sucker. I lovvvvve kids…

Ah! hindsight - where was it when I was a child?

***
And where is all this heading?

To this article which says that in Canada, textbook publishers McGraw-Hill Ryerson Ltd. have been trying to coax companies into buying advertising space in their texts. (Link through Stephen’s Web)

The article in Toronto Star describes how the publisher is pitching this idea to advertisers - “Reach a hard to get target group where they spend all their parents’ money,” says a McGraw-Hill brochure touting its planned ads. “Do you really think 18-24 year olds see those on-campus magazine ads? Do you really think they could miss an ad that is placed in a very well-respected textbook?”

The really scary thing about this is that it is not advertisers who are toying with such a thought - but the publishers who are pushing for it…

There are some sane voices against this - “Textbooks are one of the last bastions,” said Randy Stein, a partner at Grip Media Ltd., a Toronto ad agency. “There are some things that should remain pure and sacred. What’s next, university professors with logos on their blazers like NASCAR?” - but it looks like advertisers and media planners are already clapping their hands in glee at the thought of a captive - and totally malleable audience…

I tried to imagine such a situation in India - apart from marketers, will political parties also jump at this opportunity? Think : Drink Diet Pepsi and Support Saffron campaigns in your child’s civics textbook…

The last time I was so appalled was when I read about neuromarketing with children…

***

Speech and thought bubbles (or balloons) is an interesting technique used in qualitative research to understand a subject’s hidden emotions and thgouhts - what is left unsaid - due to various reasons, including politeness and political correctness, often finds expression in the thought bubble…Of course, these have been used by cartoonists for many many years before qualitative researh discovered it! Read more about them here

• Advertising , Children and youth , Branding and Marketing
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